[tobnameless]

For all of us old LOTR fans there is a book that most don’t know. It is called “Bored of the Rings.” It was published in 1969 and way to funny. Here is my meager attempt at a similar type of thing; however I want to have you all help. I will get things started and you can continue the story.

Weirdoes a Parody

Cast
Eric Avari…………………….…Sandra Suresh
Sendhil Ramamurthy……………Mohair Suresh
Hayden Panettiere…………….…Clarice Bennett
Santiago Cabrera………………...Ishmael Mendez
Ali Larter……………………….Chicka Sanders
Leonard Roberts………………...BJ and the bear Hawkins
Masi Oka………………………..Heynow Nakamura
Adrian Pasdar…………………..Bert Petrelli
Milo Ventimiglia…………...…..Ernie Petrelli
Noah Grey-Cabey………………Major Sanders
Greg Grunberg…………………..Mark Patman
Jack Coleman…………………..TCG/ Mr. Bennett
Nora Zehetner………………….Sawdim


Sandra Suresh dies mysteriously during a sexual reassignment surgery. His/her son Mohair has followed Sandra’s foot steps and became a professor despite being afflicted with a disease called, hirsutism/hypertrichosis, that makes hair grow all over his body including his face, hands, and feet. Mohair has traveled to the United States to bury his mother, nee father, and to find out how he died. During his visit to the US he will meet up with a group of people who have begun to discover that they have been gifted with powers beyond normal human capabilities.

Young Cheerleader Clarice Bennett, who is obsessed with the character of Clarice Starling of the movie “Silence of the Lambs.” She has discovered that she has unbreakable fingernails.

Ishmael Mendez, who believes that he is Capt. Ishmael of Moby Dick, can paint the future, but only if he gorges on tuna fish until he passes out.

Chicka Sanders is a single mom, who has turned to Internet Sexy Voiceovers to support herself and her son has a dark secret hiding even from herself. Chicka blacks out and wakes up to find feathers around her.

BJ and the Bear Hawkins is the fugitive husband of Chicka. He adores the TV series BJ and the bear to the point where he has obtained a monkey and travels with him. BJ has the ability to walk through walls, although he leaves a large hole in his wake.

Heynow Nakamura is a Japanese man who grew up wanting to be something more than he is. He reads comics before anything else. He has discovered that he has the ability to travel through time arriving exactly 2 minutes later than he should to do anything about what he has found rendering him impudent to be what he wants to be.


Bert and Ernie Petrelli are brothers. Bert has the ability to fly, but wants to be nothing more than normal and continue on his quest to become a corporate accountant. Ernie is his younger brother who wants to be anything and everything. He has the ability to absorb the powers of those around him for a short period of time always ending right in the middle of doing something extraordinary.

Major Sanders is the son of Chicka Sanders and BJ Hawkins. He dresses as Col. Sanders and hopes to one day raise the rank of Colonel. He is very smart; however his intelligence is limited to knowing everything about the preparation of chicken.

Mark Patman is a cop whose marriage is on the rocks because his wife is starting to think that she is gay. Mark has the ability to read minds, but everything that he hears is in French, a language he does not speak.

TCG or Mr. Sanders is Clarice’s father. He is also a member of a mysterious organization that is attempting to discover the people who have special powers. People refer to him as TCG, because he has a large chunk of tape in the center of his glasses. Tape Centered Glasses = TCG

Sawdim is a friend of Sandra Suresh and a new friend of Mohair. Her motives are up for speculation, as she seems to more than she says, of course she is a mute.


Our story opens as Clarice turns to her friend Jack and says, is the camera ready? He replies yes and she says ok. She places her fingernails in the jamb of a door and slams the door. Her fingernails break off and then instantly grow back as the camera records the event. The camera pans up and Clarice looks into the camera and says that is attempt number six.

[Super Ordinary Guy]

"We're not worthy! We're not worthy! We're not worthy!" *Wipes tears from eyes, looks around for carpet cleaner to remove new yellow spot* Wow! I laughed so hard I fell out of my chair! TCG, the Sureshes, and Major Sanders are classics!!!!! Oh, and French!

[The_Heroic_Loser]

lol. Nice one, tob!

[tobnameless]

thank you that is very kind of you

[Dargan]

gets a LMAO from me :wink:

[zorlac]

Originally Posted by tobnameless

BJ and the Bear Hawkins is the fugitive husband of Chicka. He adores the TV series BJ and the bear to the point where he has obtained a monkey and travels with him. BJ has the ability to walk through walls, although he leaves a large hole in his wake.

class!

[Ikin]

TCG or Mr. Sanders is Clarice’s father. He is also a member of a mysterious organization that is attempting to discover the people who have special powers. People refer to him as TCG, because he has a large chunk of tape in the center of his glasses. Tape Centered Glasses = TCG

Hahahahahahaha!

[phoenix23]

hahahaha.
sooooo funny.

[Oddball_Extreme]

Oh, man, I'm dying laughing on this one. That was just way too funny! I think it may be time to repost the first two parts of my wacky "Whose Hero Is It Anyway" story.